5 days and counting

Five days have already passed since I landed at Jinnah International Airport in Karachi. I feel very much at home though equally out of place. I'm fairly certain that had I not spent the first twelve years of my life here, I wouldn't know what to make of myself and my environment.

In the midst of preparations for a family wedding, I find myself noticing what the value of marriage is in Pakistani society. The sheer amount of money that is spent on clothes a girl will most probably only wear once, jewelery requiring life savings (which by the way is considered an investment though I wonder how it's an investment when no one will willingly trade in their family jewels for cash unless it's a life or death situation), and finally - dowry, makes the mind boggle. I'm confident that if and when I get married, the only extras I'm taking to my in-laws are myself, my sense of humor and my no-nonsense attitude. Of course this worries me about the fact that any matrimonial prospects may have a big "if" attached to them as I don't fit the "traditional-good-Muslim-girl-who-doesn't-ask-questions" image. On the plus side, it's a time of joy and celebration. There's always something to talk about - the venues, the tailoring, the dyers, the material, the shoes, the food, the guest list - who made the cut and who didn't. This is how it goes: whoever hasn't asked about you over the years but still demands the rights of family are to be strictly and deliberately excluded. They are not to be told of the wedding. If they find out from a third party and feel the sting of this exclusion and "disrespect", even better! Second, the makeup artist is crucial! THERE IS NO WEDDING without a makeup artist who's famous in the city and charges unimaginable amounts of money. After all, how can a bride keep face when mentioning an unknown makeup artist and designer if a guest asks her - which they will and then they'll compare notes.

What I AM loving and wish there was more of in the West is hospitality and generosity. This isn't to say that generosity is second nature to all Pakistanis, but it's certainly an intrinsic part of most locals' upbringing. People insist on paying the bill in Pakistan. Abroad, you argue over who owes one cent less.

I can honestly say that I'm not missing London or Holland too much which means I'm having a good time here and being entertained well. The only time I want to teleport myself is on a Friday or Saturday night when I KNOW I'd be up to slightly more than watching old Bollywood films on TV and lying awake in bed, restless, till 5am;)