Friends of friends

Should you be friends with your friends' friends?

I decided to blog about this as it’s something we encounter on a regular basis and a situation we are guaranteed to find ourselves in at some point or another.

I have met the most wonderful people through my friends – either by introduction or by chance. I have also consciously introduced friends to other friends where I felt they shared common interests (besides myself).

A friend once told me "I don’t do friends of friends". I can understand this thought. I can also imagine the downside of this - the friends you introduced with every good intention forget about you and solidify their friendship without you. This happens, yes. Is anyone to blame? If one thinks about this rationally, no. The heart wants what it wants. Just as connection between two people cannot be forced, it cannot be broken if it wasn’t weak to begin with.

The way I see it, when you share a common circle of friends, it brings you closer. It offers different opportunities to socialise. It brings a different dynamic to your existing equation. And it can come in handy. It isn't uncommon to find yourself caught between two friends who are having differences or drifting apart. This is where a mutual friends situation helps. March in and try to make them talk. No one knows both of them better than you after all.

Similarly, I have always felt (either as a credit to my cultural background or my nature) that a friendship is not complete without some family involvement. I have to know my closest friends’ family members. Their parents and siblings have to know me – and like me;)

A friend’s parent once told me "when you are with *said friend* I know she has a bullet proof vest on her". It’s the most beautiful thing anyone else’s parent has said to me. That and "you’re like my daughter as well".

Of course if our parents knew each other even better, but as this isn't a Bollywood drama I’ll let this one slide.

I feel privileged to have such wonderful friends that others who have heard of them or met them by chance ask me to invite them over or want me to tell them to host a party where they can invite themselves.

The only reservation I have is when the whole friends of friends concept isn't reciprocated. We have all invested in our friendships and a little bit of possessiveness is allowed. I'll show you mine if you show me yours;)